Starting Fresh

Just recently I was left with a whole new canvas to paint. My best friend moved back home for good, I moved out of the place I called home for the past year and a half, leaving all my friends behind. I have stepped out of my norm and it isn't easy. It is safe to say- and you can ask anyone who knows me- I am not good with change. I have trouble re-adapting myself. I have trouble escaping the easy and finding the new. The last few years have been a roller coaster ride. I have graduated, started off university, switched degrees, moved, met so many great friends and said that many more good-byes and thats just the tip of the iceberg. To most people these things may not seem like a big impact on a life. To most people these things seem petty and just a way of life. But to me- and again ask anyone who knows me- these things are my life. I get trapped in the norm of things and get used to what is easy. Then when it is time to change, and lets be honest it always happens, I feel like it's the end of the world. I have to start new and things are going to be different. These changes are so hard for me. I never know what I want and I never know what is going to make me happy. I was happy with the old ways, I was happy in the easy. Now it is time to start fresh. New house, new friends, new classes, new relationships. It is going to be hard, but hopefully in the end I come out stronger with a better appreciation for change. There is nothing I can do to stop change I can only accept it as it comes. Knowing this makes me choke up and resent all the people that caused the change. But taking a double thought I know it is a way of life and no one is going to be stuck in one place forever. No one is going to be living in their norm. Life moves and changes and we all experience different things. We all want to look back on our lives and be happy with all our decisions and adventures. Being stuck in the norm wont give you that happiness. You have to take the risk, live up to the challenge and as hard as it may be, go with the change. It is tough for me but I have no doubts that my life will live out to being amazing.