September School

Back to school, back to school. It's been a bit wild for the past little bit. I was straight back into the get go after getting home from Australia. Seriously. Busy everyday. If it wasn't work it was play. Every day had something planned in it. Which was good for me because it kept me distracted from the fact that I am not in Australia anymore and saved me from the "reverse culture shock". I definitely thought I was going to have a break down after arriving home. Stepping back to the norm and all. But I didn't. Probably because I was so busy. Don't get me wrong, I miss everyone and everything so unbelievably much it's hard to think. That's when I get upset. When I start thinking all about my friends and all the adventures. I miss it. I just want to travel now. But that's besides the point.

Now it's school time. YAY!! (nayyy). I was really NOT looking forward at all to moving back to Nanaimo. I was really NOT looking forward to going to school. I was really NOT looking forward to continuing something I know I am not going to be doing with my life. This isn't my calling. After an extremely AMAZING week at camp (Camp Imadene. Go.) I was about to fall straight back into my fellowship-less life of boring and struggle. I don't live in a Christian home so it is hard for me to stay connected in a way to God I feel when I am around other believers. I can't talk about it with my roommates or family because all I really get is blank face. I miss being about to witness. I miss being able to lead. I miss being about to devote. I miss being able to share. God is amazing and I love all that He does in my life. I love being able to talk about that and share with others. So naturally coming home from camp I had a sever case of "camp high". I was devastated.

On moving day I was close to tears with every shirt I folded and every pair of pants packed. I REALLY DID NOT WANT TO MOVE. My mom dropped me off and I burst into tears. All she could really do is tell me it was going to be okay. I would figure it out she said. At that point all I could think was I have it figured out! I know my calling, God reminds me every day. And right here right now certainly isn't it.

God knew the struggles I was going through and He managed to show me the good in this situation. Everywhere I looked I managed to stumble upon a quote: "This is not my home. This is not where I belong" "All I know is I am not home yet". Well played again God. SO TRUE! This isn't my home. This isn't where I belong! I don't have to get sucked into the life here. EXCITING!

My attitude took a complete turn around and I was able to get excited about the future and not get upset about where I am now. I know God has a plan for me and I know the path He is directing me to now. A life of leadership and ministry and I am so excited to see the amazing wonders God has planned for me in that life.

So with all that said, I came to a conclusion. I am dropping out of school (who called it?) and moving to Salt Spring Island (who called it?)  in January with my dear friend Amy C. WEE! I am so excited. Next year I will start my path in a leadership and ministry program. I don't know which yet. I am still waiting on God for that. It could be Auxano, Cappenray, YWAM, or bible college (back in Australia maybe???). But what I do know is that where ever this takes me it is just going to be amazing. God is going to work in me and through me and show me my direction. A direction of meaning and truth. A direction that is amazing-as.

One Month

Today marks exactly one month since I've been home from Australia. I honestly don't know what to say to describe how I feel. It all feels so surreal. Almost like Australia was one big dream. I mean I know I was there and I have the pictures to prove it but it still, for some reason, doesn't feel real. I had the time of my life and I learned a lot and I wanted to share some of them with you. So are some experiences, differences and lesson I learned along the way:

- I got to see footy for the first time
- I got to see cricket for the first time
- I drove on the other side of the road
- Seagulls in Australia are smaller
- I got to scuba dive on the most famous reef in the world
- I pet a kangaroo
- People in Australia still rock the bleached hair, beach, surfer look
- I got to experience life with no care
- Some words have an "r" sound added to the end (bra-er) and some have the "r" sound removed (Melbourne=Melbun)
- I learned how to paddle board
- I visited Steve Irwin in his natural habitat
- I learned how to surf
- I got the most epic, wicked, dark skin tan. Ever.
- Pedestrians DON'T have the right of way (AT ALL... I almost died several times)
- I saw the whitest sand I've ever seen in my entire life
- School was a vacation. Literally.
- I met some of the most friendliest people alive.
- I ziplined in Australian jungle.
- I went to the most amazing church ever. Planetshakers.
- I saw the opera house.
- I did the full Manly Beach Walk
- Vegemite is disgusting
- I got to live a day ahead of everyone
- I got to experience the true "red rock" outback
- I got to see a long lost friend
- I rekindled old friendships as if we were never apart
- I got to experience my first "front page news" shark attack story
- I learned that distance really does make the heart grow fonder
- I made some of the most amazing life time friendships
- I learned how to completely remove myself from uncomfortable situations
- I learned what it was like to actually cook properly
- Being on your own with absolutely no one is a challenge but it is a challenge that makes you a better person
- I pet a koala
- I got to experience living with no form of income and running low on money
- I learned to fully appreciate the friendships I have and the family I have
- I ignited a fire to travel

Throughout this experience I learned what it was actually like to be a grown up and live completely separated from anything that makes you comfortable. I grew as a person and figured out what I actually want to do with my life. I grew stronger in my relationship with God and learned how to live my life just for Him and Him alone. I realized that myself is the only person I am supposed to try and please and learned that I am still learning how to do that. Throughout this experience I learned more about me and what I really want to do. I got to experience things beyond my wildest dreams and lived my life as an adventure and not just a life. I made some amazing friends and said so many truly hard goodbyes. I learned that home is really where the heart is and that right now mine is bouncing back and forth from Canada to Australia. I learned that to fully live your life you have to step outside of your comfort zone and experience. I learned that simply existing isn't enough. You have to live.

I am so thankful for this experience and amazing adventure. I could not have asked for something better. Thank you Australia for making me grow up, find my passion and truly live.

Dear Australia:
Your love is my love and my love is your love, it would take an eternity to break us and the chains of Amistad couldn´t hold us. 

--- Missing you.

Outback, Perth, Sydney, Home

Well I know it has been a while since I've posted, but I've been a busy gal. I feel weird writing about my last days in Australia when they were so long ago, but here it goes. 

School finished up, exams were complete, studying was over. Apart from a few mini road trips to windy beaches and forest zip lines, there wasn't really much too much interesting things going on. Everyday was the same as the one before: go to school, come home, veg. It was a great system and a great way to study for exams. I found out I was failing economics so I had to put my behind to work and actually do something for once (and it payed off, I passed! YAY!). But once school was over, I had to say goodbye to so many amazing people. It was one of the hardest things I had ever had to go through. If you know me well, you know I cry. A LOT. So after many tearful goodbyes and photo shoots, I was hitting the open road again as a gypsy traveller. First stop, the outback. 

Kailey and I took on this adventure as solo Canadians doing a tour. I couldn't have thought of a better partner in crime the the one and only Kailey Suthers. We traveled so well together it was insane! We took a tour called The Rock Tour. It was unreal. A 2 night 3 day camping (yes camping, aren't you proud?) tour. We started off in Alice Springs, the sketchy sketch of Australia, and headed straight to Kings Canyon to do a 3 hour hike. The morning started at 5am so you could imagine how tired we were. Regardless, the views were spectacular. Unbelievable creations I tell you!

Next stop was Uluru and Kata Tjuta. UN-REAL! I can't even begin to describe to you how amaze-balls this was. Starting with the culture, the views, the creation. Oh man. Had to have been one of the coolest things I have ever seen! We were fortunate enough to watch a sunset and sunrise at Uluru, which is this big giant rock in the middle of no where. We also were able to hike around both Uluru and Kata Tjuta which was fantastic. Our tour guide was amazing. It was just so fantastic. Apart from the barely sleeping and collecting our own fire wood at 7am. But regardless, I would do it over again in a heartbeat. I also got to ride a camel which was the funniest thing I've ever done. 

The next stop was Perth  where I got to visit a long lost friend of  mine. To be completely honest, I was pretty uneasy about going to see him since it had been almost 9 years since I'd see him last. But it ended up being such an amazing time! We got along so well and I was so happy to see him. His family was the nicest and we just spent our days touring around little ol Perth and had a blast. It was great. Another wonderful memory from the books. 

After that I headed to my last stop which was Sydney. It was great to be back in Sydney again. Will and Nikki came to join me for the few days I was there. We had a great time just hanging out and reminiscing about good times. I got to see Emily and Adam again which was wonderful. I hit up the typical tourist spots in Sydney and soaked up my last few days in Australia. 

After some (lots) tears, it was time to say goodbye. I don't think I've ever been so sad to leave something behind before. I cannot put into words the feelings that were taking over my mind. Being in Australia on my own for 6 months was such an experience. It was almost like I was living a different life. Leaving was one of the hardest things I had ever had to do. It was such a bittersweet feeling. On one hand I was excited to see my friends and family and relive Island life. But on the other, more overpowering hand, I was so devastated to leave such a wonderful experience full of friends and amazing times behind. I can easily say I've made some of the best friends I'll ever have right there in Australia. I can't even describe to you how life changing and spectacular this adventure has been. 

So to all my friends in Australia, if you are reading this, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for being so welcoming to me. Thank you for giving me such a fantastic time. Thank you for making this an unforgettable experience. Thank you for sharing your lives with me and being my friends. Above all else, thank you for being amazing as. 

She always faces tomorrow with a smile... 

proverbs 31 (MSG)

‎"I beg young people to travel. If you don’t have a passport, get one. Take a summer, get a backpack and go to Delhi, go to Saigon, go to Bangkok, go to Kenya. 

Have your mind blown. 

Eat interesting food. Dig some interesting people. 

Have an adventure. 

Be careful. 

Come back and you’re going to see your country differently, you’re going to see your president differently, no matter who it is. 

Music, 

culture,

 food, 

water. 

Your showers will become shorter. You’re going to get a sense of what globalization looks like. It’s not what Tom Friedman writes about; 

I’m sorry. 

You’re going to see that global climate change is very real. And that for some people, their day consists of walking 12 miles for four buckets of water. 

And so there are lessons that you can’t get out of a book that are waiting for you at the other end of that flight. A lot of people—Americans and Europeans—come back and go,

 ohhhhh. 

And the light bulb goes on."

— Henry Rollins

As I sit here pretending to do my homework and assignments, I got to thinking: I have been here for nearly 4 months. That is well over the "half time" mark of me being in Australia. Which means the majority of my time here has come and gone and soon I will be on a plane jetting back to beautiful British Columbia. It is a pretty sad thought and as I was talking to my friend Josh about only being around for a short while more, I had to stop him from speaking as I was being brought to tears. It has been such a lovely and discomforting (in a good way) stay here. I've learned so much about myself and I have really grown. Moreover, I've really grown in my relationship with God as well which I didn't think would be what I was taking home with me and getting out of this experience. What really pushed my faith over the edge was the PlanetShakers conference. I remember walking back to the car with my friend Justine and her mentioning that she felt I wasn't meant to come to Australia for school and an awesome experience, I was meant to come to grow in my relationship with God. At that moment I really felt like that's what my calling here was. I took a moment to register in my faith and it really is true. I've grown so much and God has stopped being the thing that is there for when I need him, but the Lord and King who is there all the time. My heart is more focused on Him and my mind is not only thinking of Him at night when I pray but during little moments in the day of happiness, suffering, trial, frustration, content, admiration and love. God is such a powerful attendy in my life now. This adventure has really re confirmed my faith and I wouldn't change a single minute of it. I came on to blog something funny, but it took a whirlwind of a change when I mentioned how great our God actually is and now I can't stop writing about our amazing creator. I feel my heart being called to do something greater in this world. I've always known I can't do a job where I am not helping people. It is in my soul. I need to make a difference and I need to help those in need. I've been trying to find a perfect placement for myself but could never settle and never really felt God's peace about it. Then it hit me: Youth Ministry. It was first a very scary thought and a very uncomfortable one. But God doesn't keep us in our comfort zones. He challenges our faith. He doesn't want us living safe lives where we hide and huddle in our rooms. He wants us to go out and experience. And we can't get experience if we don't take risks. He gives us nothing we can't handle. So for me to enter Youth Ministry is a very scary and big risk. I've never been good at swaying people. I've never been good at public speaking. I've always been the one to sit in the back and shrug off differences and always be like "you have your opinions I have mine". I've never been one to share the amazing-ness of our Lord with non-believers. In fact, it made me unbelievably uncomfortable getting into conversations and debates. But God said "NO! This is your place". Overwhelmed is the only word I can use to describe this. I now have this unending feeling of wanting to spread the word and news to those young teenagers who were just like me trying to figure themselves out. I want to work mostly with girls who are in that stage of unknowing because I was in that exact place not so long ago. I can tell you now if I had someone like who I am wanting to be helping me out every step of the way, my life would have come to Christ so much quicker. My life would have been ever so exploding with the love of God that I wouldn't have been able to be stopped. I wouldn't have been afraid to share my discoveries with my parents. I wouldn't have been afraid to witness to those who were seeking. I wouldn't have been uncertain of what it actually is that God has done to my life and those around me. This is what I want and this is what my heart is being called to do. Minister. Preach. Witness. All for the glory of God. Not to mention I will be able to do this with my sidekick in Christ, Amy Pickard, who is also being called to this. This post here goes to show how overwhelming this feeling and calling is because I never intended to come on and write about this. In fact, I intended to not tell people until I was sure. But God has other plans. Don't worry though, the previous "funny" post I mentioned I would do will come along shortly. I apparently just needed to share with you my new and awesome discovery. God is amazing. Amazing-as.

How can we look at this world see this kind of beauty and still only think it's man made.